Good evening world... I spent the whole day at home today. Wow... I'm such a slacker... Only did 5 things ever since I woke up. Read, use the com., watch TV, eat and go toilet. Watched smallville on my computer just now. Lana Lang is sooooo preetttyyy!!!! Reminds me of Eileen. I'm serious! Also watched some romantic show... [Eileen just messaged me...] starring Jennifer Lopez.. dunno what its called...

Looked through one of my old exercise books where I wrote poems... Wrote them when I was in secondary school... 3+ years ago... Read some poems and was surprised that some of them apply to my situation now... Here's one...

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Falling Down

I fell down on my knees and cried
as a part inside me died
I cannot pretend nothing is wrong and lie
when you are about to say goodbye

I'll never let you go
I'll never turn away
If I had a choice, I'd never be gone
If it was my choice, Our love would go on

You say the pain that I feel will go away
but it won't, thats what I say
You've changed me and I'll never return
You're leaving and what have I learnt?

Do I mean nothing to you?
Is there nothing we can do?
to get back together as before?
to be together once more?

If you knew how precious you are to me
If you ever thought about my feelings
You would have understood and known
Why I'm down on my knees to cry
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Gosh... I'm back where I started 3 years ago... But now I have God beside me... At least with Him, I can move forward and not move in circles anymore. Eileen messaged me... Should I reply? Should I call her? I want to, I want to, I want to. God... how?